I hold my breath, there's a smile on my face, and my face wasn't made to wait

Kastellet and morning sun on

I told you 'bout all those fears,
And away they did run.
You sure must be strong,
And you feel like an ocean being warmed by the sun.

I'm stepping on nothing.

I quit my job yesterday morning and I'm leaving Helsinki behind on the 1st of May. I have no job or apartment waiting for me when I land, but I know quite a few friendly faces, how to use the S-tog and the metro, and how to get a certain bartender's number. I know the place makes me lose kilos as accidentally as one loses keys (happiness makes you thin, that's what they say).

I'm hoping my fears will vanish even though I know they won't. They're all tumbled together, the fear of Rue des Archives and Nørrebrogade and the huge unknown and I can't make sense of it all.

Since cynisism isn't making me free, I'm turning to extreme naïveté. I'm scared. So I'm leaving. The only medicine for fear is to face it and just go go go go go. You can't second-guess these things. No-one lives an interesting life by sticking to their day jobs and apartments and lousy, grey weekdays.

A thousand conundrums at once, I love my life and I hate it to bits.


  1. I don't remember how I found your blog, but I must say that you are amazing and light and so beautiful.
    I would like to learn to live as freely as you seem to do, but sometimes it just feels that I'm not enough.
    How do you come up with those ideas and dreams and how do you make them happen?

  2. Laura; Thanks so so much, I had actually no idea anyone read this blog anymore. I don't feel like I live that freely, I guess that's the dilemma. I have a hazy head full of ideas and possibilities and whenever I try to hold onto one I seem to find others and slip. Copenhagen was a strike of lightning, it took 11 days to have it all figured out and suddenly I had quit my job and begun the journey. I guess for an impulsive person like myself the only option is to just lose yourself in the moment and do it.

    Anonymous; <3 <3 <3!